Don't Wait to Be Asked

Parshas Vayeira | A Lesson in Seeing Beyond Ourselves

As published on https://blogs.timesofisrael.com/

There is something interesting about the way Avraham welcomed his guests in this week's Torah portion, Vayeira. He didn't wait for them to knock on his door or approach him asking for food or shelter. He saw three travellers in the distance and ran towards them, inviting them into his home. He wasn't responding to a request for help. He was actively looking for an opportunity to help.

What makes this even more extraordinary is the circumstances. Avraham was 99 years old and recovering from his circumcision just three days earlier, traditionally considered the most painful stage of recovery. The day was unbearably hot, and we are taught that Avraham was distressed because there were no travellers around for him to welcome. Even while suffering physically, his concern was not simply for his own comfort. He wanted to be of service to someone else.

What if we approached life with that same attitude?

So often, we are willing to help when someone asks. A friend calls needing a favour, a colleague requests assistance, or a family member tells us they're struggling. We might happily respond. But there is a significant difference between being willing to help and actively looking for someone who needs our help.

Think about the people around us. A child who is unusually quiet, a friend who seems overwhelmed, a colleague struggling with their workload, or even a stranger who looks lost. How often do we notice these things but continue with our day, assuming that if they really need something, they'll ask?

Perhaps the real challenge is not whether we are prepared to help, but whether we are prepared to inconvenience ourselves enough to notice.

Avraham didn't simply open his home. He left the comfort of his tent, ran into the heat and personally attended to his guests. His hospitality required effort, initiative and a willingness to put someone else's needs before his own.

And then something remarkable happened. These travellers, who were actually angels, brought Avraham and Sarah the extraordinary news that they would finally have a son. Avraham went out looking for an opportunity to give, and through that encounter, he received an incredible blessing.

Of course, we shouldn't help others because we expect something in return. But there is a powerful lesson here. Sometimes the greatest blessings in life come through the relationships we build, the people we help and the opportunities we create when we look beyond ourselves.

The Lubavitcher Rebbe taught that when two people meet, their encounter should bring benefit to a third person. In other words, our relationships should not exist solely for our own enjoyment or advantage. They should create something positive beyond ourselves.

We spend so much of our lives working towards security, comfort and personal success. These are important goals. But surely life must be about more than making sure our own needs are met.

Perhaps we should measure our success not only by what we have achieved for ourselves, but also by how much better someone else's life has become because we were part of it.

This week, don't wait for someone to ask for help. Look around, notice who might need something, and take the initiative.

Because sometimes, the greatest thing we can offer another person is the simple reassurance that someone noticed, someone cared, and someone was willing to act.

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About the author: Elimelech Levy is a Rabbi, educator, and coach based in Sydney, Australia. He is the director of Chabad Youth NSW, where he develops programs that support Jewish identity, confidence, and community connection for young people and families.

Alongside his communal work, Elimelech holds an MBA from Macquarie University and is a member of the International Coaching Federation. His coaching focuses on helping individuals gain clarity, set meaningful goals, and take consistent action.

He is also the founder of the Knei Lecha Chover initiative, a global peer coaching network for rabbis, and is involved in property development projects that reflect his broader interest in building sustainable communities.

More at elilevy.com.au

You Can't Grow If You're Not Willing to Leave Something Behind

Parshas Lech Lecha | Personal Development

There is something fascinating about the way a lobster grows. Unlike humans, a lobster has a hard outer shell that cannot expand with its body. Eventually, the shell that once provided protection becomes too restrictive. In order to grow, the lobster must shed its old shell and develop a new, larger one. During this process, it becomes particularly vulnerable. Yet without going through this uncomfortable experience, it simply cannot continue growing. Perhaps the same is true for us. Sometimes the very things that make us feel safe and comfortable are the things preventing us from growing.

We all have our comfort zones. Our routines, relationships and familiar environments provide security. We know what to expect and how to navigate our daily lives. Yet how often do we find ourselves wanting something more? Perhaps a new opportunity, better health, greater success or simply becoming a better version of ourselves. We want change, but somehow never quite get around to making it happen. The problem is often uncertainty. What if things don't work out? Why should I risk what I already have for something I might never achieve? Perhaps life is perfectly fine the way it is. Do I really need to do more? These are reasonable questions. Not every change is worthwhile. But there is an important difference between choosing to remain where we are because it's the right place for us, and remaining there simply because we're afraid to leave.

In this week's Parsha, Lech Lecha, Hashem tells Avraham to leave his land, birthplace and father's home, and travel to a land that He will show him. Consider what Avraham was being asked to do. He had an established life, familiar surroundings, relationships and an entire infrastructure around him. In modern terms, he had his usual doctor, barber, friends and community. Everything that made life comfortable and predictable. Yet his future was somewhere else.

Avraham wasn't even told exactly where he was going. He simply had to trust, take the first step and begin the journey. And despite the many challenges that followed, his decision ultimately shaped the course of history. Thousands of years later, billions of people still look to Abraham as a foundational figure of their faith. What can we learn from this?

Perhaps you've been thinking about joining a gym, improving your health, learning a new skill, starting a business or pursuing an opportunity. But you keep waiting for the right time. Another week passes, another month, sometimes another year. The Talmud teaches, "B'derech she'adam rotzeh leilech, molichin oso", along the path a person wishes to travel, they assist him. We cannot expect things to happen simply because we wish for them. We need to choose a direction and make a genuine effort to move towards it. That doesn't guarantee success, but opportunities often emerge only once we begin taking action.

And taking the plunge doesn't necessarily mean making a dramatic or reckless change. Sometimes it simply means making that phone call, signing up for that course or committing to that first exercise session. Like Avraham, we don't need to see the entire journey before beginning.

So ask yourself: What is something you've wanted to do for a long time but have been putting off? And what's one practical step you could take this week to begin?

Because sometimes, to discover what we're capable of becoming, we first need the courage to move beyond what we already know.

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About the author: Elimelech Levy is a Rabbi, educator, and coach based in Sydney, Australia. He is the director of Chabad Youth NSW, where he develops programs that support Jewish identity, confidence, and community connection for young people and families.

Alongside his communal work, Elimelech holds an MBA from Macquarie University and is a member of the International Coaching Federation. His coaching focuses on helping individuals gain clarity, set meaningful goals, and take consistent action.

He is also the founder of the Knei Lecha Chover initiative, a global peer coaching network for rabbis, and is involved in property development projects that reflect his broader interest in building sustainable communities.

More at elilevy.com.au

You Can't Control the Storm, But You Can Build an Ark

A lesson in personal growth from Parshas Noach

Life has a way of presenting us with challenges we never anticipated. Economic uncertainty, relationship difficulties, health concerns or unexpected setbacks can suddenly disrupt the plans we have carefully made. We often respond by becoming frustrated, anxious or overwhelmed, particularly when the circumstances seem completely beyond our control. But perhaps one of the most important lessons we can learn is to distinguish between what happens around us and what we can actually do about it.

In this week's Parsha, Noach is warned that a devastating Flood is coming, one that will destroy the world as he knows it. Yet G-d doesn't instruct him to stop the rain or prevent the Flood. Instead, He tells him to build an ark. Noach cannot control the approaching storm, but he can prepare for it. He can follow the instructions he has been given, build a vessel capable of protecting his family and the animals entrusted to him, and take responsibility for what lies within his ability to accomplish.

Stephen Covey, author of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, describes a similar principle through his concepts of the Circle of Concern and Circle of Influence. Our Circle of Concern includes all the things that affect or worry us, from world events and economic conditions to other people's decisions and behaviour. But within that larger circle is a smaller Circle of Influence, representing the things we can actually do something about. Covey suggests that effective people focus their energy on expanding their influence rather than becoming consumed by circumstances they cannot control.

This distinction is particularly important because it works in both directions. On the one hand, we need to accept that there are things beyond our control. Worrying endlessly about them, becoming angry or blaming others will not necessarily change the situation. On the other hand, we must recognise that where we do have the ability to act, we also have a responsibility to do so. We cannot simply sit back and hope that problems will resolve themselves when there are practical steps available to us.

So what does it mean to build an ark in our own lives? The answer will be different for each of us. For someone concerned about financial uncertainty, it might mean living within their means, reducing unnecessary debt or building savings. For a parent, it could mean investing time in developing a strong relationship with their children before difficulties arise. For someone concerned about their health, it may mean establishing better habits around exercise, nutrition and sleep. And for a person facing emotional or personal challenges, building an ark might mean developing resilience, strengthening relationships or seeking appropriate guidance and support.

The common thread is preparation. We cannot anticipate every challenge life will bring, nor can we guarantee that our preparations will protect us from every difficulty. But we can make ourselves better equipped to respond when challenges arise. Too often, we wait until a problem becomes urgent before taking action, even when we know that small steps taken earlier could make a significant difference.

There is another important dimension to this lesson. Building an ark requires us to think beyond ourselves. Noach was not instructed to build a small shelter for his own protection. He was given responsibility for his family and for preserving the animals that would repopulate the world. Similarly, our responsibilities extend to the people who depend on us. As parents, spouses, leaders, employers or members of a community, we may not be able to solve every problem, but we should recognise the difference our actions can make in the lives of others.

Perhaps the greatest challenge is knowing when to accept circumstances and when to take action. We sometimes exhaust ourselves worrying about matters beyond our influence while neglecting the very things we could be doing to improve our situation. The lesson of Noach reminds us to redirect our attention from the approaching storm to the ark we have the ability to build.

This week, consider the challenges or uncertainties that concern you most. Ask yourself which aspects are genuinely beyond your control and which are within your ability to influence. Then identify one practical step you can take to prepare, protect or improve your circumstances.

You may not be able to control the storms that come into your life, but you can take responsibility for the ark you build to face them.

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About the author: Elimelech Levy is a Rabbi, educator, and coach based in Sydney, Australia. He is the director of Chabad Youth NSW, where he develops programs that support Jewish identity, confidence, and community connection for young people and families.

Alongside his communal work, Elimelech holds an MBA from Macquarie University and is a member of the International Coaching Federation. His coaching focuses on helping individuals gain clarity, set meaningful goals, and take consistent action.

He is also the founder of the Knei Lecha Chover initiative, a global peer coaching network for rabbis, and is involved in property development projects that reflect his broader interest in building sustainable communities.

More at elilevy.com.au