Where Are You? The Question That Can Change Your Life

A lesson in personal growth from Parshas Bereishis

As we begin a new cycle of reading the Torah, we return to the story of Adam and Chava in the Garden of Eden. Following their decision to eat from the Tree of Knowledge, they became aware of their nakedness and hid among the trees. The Torah tells us that G-d called out to Adam and asked, "Ayeka?" Where are you? (Bereishis 3:9). But surely the Almighty, who knows everything, knew exactly where Adam was hiding? Rashi explains that G-d was not seeking information. Rather, He wanted to begin a conversation gently, without startling Adam with a sudden confrontation.

There is a famous story about Rabbi Schneur Zalman of Liadi, the Alter Rebbe, founder of Chabad Chassidism, who was imprisoned in Czarist Russia in 1798. Among the accusations against him was that he had sent funds to support Jews living in the Land of Israel, then under Ottoman rule, an empire hostile to Russia. During his imprisonment, a senior Russian official asked him why G-d had questioned Adam's whereabouts. After offering Rashi's explanation, the Alter Rebbe revealed a deeper meaning: "Where are you?" is a question G-d asks every person throughout their life. You have been given years to live, abilities to develop and opportunities to fulfil. What have you achieved, and what remains for you to accomplish? According to the traditional account, the Alter Rebbe even mentioned the official's precise age, turning a biblical question into a deeply personal challenge.

We spend so much of our lives rushing from one responsibility to another. Days become weeks, months become years, and before we know it, another year has passed. We may be busy and even successful, but how often do we stop to ask whether we are actually becoming the people we want to be? Are we more patient, generous and understanding than we were a year ago? Are we investing in the relationships that matter most? Are our daily actions aligned with the values we claim are important?

There is another fascinating Chassidic insight into the story of Adam and Chava. They began life in Gan Eden, surrounded by beauty and abundance, with their needs provided for. Yet Chassidus explains that their decision to eat from the Tree of Knowledge was motivated by something deeper than temptation. They believed that by leaving the perfection of Gan Eden and entering a world of struggle, where good and evil were intertwined, they could fulfil a greater purpose: becoming active partners with G-d in transforming His world. Although their actions were contrary to G-d's explicit command, their desire to accomplish something meaningful reveals a profound truth about human existence.

We were not created simply to enjoy a comfortable life. We were created to contribute, overcome challenges and make the world a better place. We begin life as completely dependent infants, gradually developing into independent adults capable of taking responsibility for ourselves and others. But surely our development is not meant to end when we become physically mature or financially secure. We must continue growing in character, wisdom and our ability to contribute. Whether we are forty, sixty or eighty, there is always an opportunity to become a better parent, spouse, friend or human being.

One of the greatest dangers we face is not necessarily failure, but stagnation. We become comfortable with our habits and personalities, telling ourselves, "That's just the way I am." Yet the message of Bereishis challenges that assumption. Creation is an ongoing responsibility, and perhaps the most important place to begin improving the world is with ourselves. This is why we must regularly ask, "Ayeka?" Where am I today compared with a year ago? What have I learned? What still needs improving? And what is the next step towards becoming the person I aspire to be?

The purpose of these questions is not to make ourselves feel guilty about what we have failed to achieve, but to recognise the opportunities still ahead. As we begin another cycle of Torah reading, perhaps we can begin a new cycle of personal reflection, committing ourselves to continue growing, learning and improving.

The question is not simply where you are today, but whether you are becoming the person you have the potential to be. So take a moment to ask yourself the question G-d asked Adam at the very beginning of human history: Ayeka? Where are you? And where do you want to go from here?

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About the author: Elimelech Levy is a Rabbi, educator, and coach based in Sydney, Australia. He is the director of Chabad Youth NSW, where he develops programs that support Jewish identity, confidence, and community connection for young people and families.

Alongside his communal work, Elimelech holds an MBA from Macquarie University and is a member of the International Coaching Federation. His coaching focuses on helping individuals gain clarity, set meaningful goals, and take consistent action.

He is also the founder of the Knei Lecha Chover initiative, a global peer coaching network for rabbis, and is involved in property development projects that reflect his broader interest in building sustainable communities.

More at elilevy.com.au