My Brain Explosion: 10 Things I Learned the Hard Way

Parshas Re’eh – Life Is About Choices

Have you ever done something in a moment of frustration that you instantly regretted? I have. And mine ended up in the headlines.

A few years ago, under a mountain of stress, little sleep, juggling two jobs, an MBA, and my mother’s devastating illness, I lost it. Another driver took the parking spot I’d been waiting for. Tired and stretched beyond breaking, I snapped. I damaged his car.

Within minutes I realised how wrong it was. I came back, left my phone number on the windscreen, and owned up. But the damage was done — not just to the car, but to my reputation. The media called it a “brain explosion.” Articles spread. My family felt the shame. And just when I thought it was behind me, I discovered a professor in Oxford had used my story as a case study in his book.

For a long time I wanted to bury it, hide it, pretend it didn’t happen. But eventually I realised: the story isn’t going away. The only thing I can do is choose how to respond.

And that’s where this week’s Torah portion, Re’eh, speaks loudly to me. Moshe tells the Jewish people: “See, I set before you today a blessing and a curse.” Life is about choices. Sometimes we choose well, sometimes badly. But the real test is: what do you choose next?

What I Learned

Here are ten lessons I’ve taken from my “brain explosion.” Maybe they’ll help you too:

1. Pause before reacting. Even five seconds of breathing can change the outcome.

2. A small action can have huge consequences. What felt small in the moment became years of fallout.

3. Mistakes ripple outward. It wasn’t just me — my family and community felt it too.

4. The internet never forgets. But you can reclaim your voice and tell your own story.

5. Leadership doesn’t mean perfection. It means taking responsibility when you fall short.

6. Owning up matters. Leaving that note on the windscreen was a turning point.

7. People remember how you respond. Recovery can speak louder than failure.

8. Shame can be a teacher. Painful, but also a push to grow.

9. We all fail differently. Some in private, some in public. What matters is what you do next.

10. Teshuvah is real. Judaism reminds us: a mistake isn’t the end. Repair and return are always possible.

    
    

One of the things I love about the Torah is that it doesn’t hide the mistakes of its heroes. It tells us about Noach, Moshe, Dovid — not to excuse them, but to remind us they were real people. And to teach us that failure isn’t final. Greatness is found in how you get back up.

One of my motivations for becoming a coach is this very lesson. Too many people live on the edge, juggling too much, burning the candle at both ends, just one stress away from doing something they’ll regret. I know what that feels like. And I want to help people recognise the signs earlier, make better choices, and build resilience.

I wouldn’t have chosen this story for myself. But it’s mine. And if sharing it helps someone else pause before exploding, or find the courage to grow after a mistake, then maybe that’s a blessing hidden inside the curse. Because in the words of this week’s parsha: “See, I place before you today a blessing and a curse…” The choice is always ours.

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About the author:

Elimelech Levy is a Rabbi and Coach in Sydney Australia where he runs Chabad Youth NSW, A youth organisation that's focused on providing Jewish enrichment that's educational, fun, social ​& affordable. Elimelech received his MBA from Macquarie University in 2021 then chose to use his studies and experience to become a Results Coach and member of the International Coaching Federation (ICF)  helping people take control of their lives through establishing goals and working towards them. In 2023, Elimelech established the Knei Lecha Chover program focused on matching pairs of Rabbis around the world and providing foundational tools for them to coach each other regularly, helping them to avoid significant fees needed for professional coaching sessions.

Elimelech can be reached via his website elilevy.com.au 

Parshat Eikev – The Power of the Small Things

In this week’s parsha, Eikev, Rashi notes that the word eikev can mean “heel.” He explains that this hints to the mitzvot a person might “tread upon with their heel”—the small commandments, the ones we might overlook because they seem less significant.

It’s a striking thought: often, the things that seem small in the moment are exactly the things that shape our lives.

Jordan Peterson the famous clinical psychologist speaks about the power of our daily habits. The actions we repeat each day—often without much thought—are the building blocks of our character and our future. Whether we notice it or not, the small routines form the architecture of our lives.

Think about it. Every morning you wake up. Some people make their bed right away, and at the end of the day they return to a clean, inviting space. You brush your teeth for two minutes. You have your morning coffee. You help the kids get ready for school. Maybe you drive them, maybe you walk them. Maybe you go to pray..

These aren’t dramatic, headline-worthy moments—but they’re the fabric of life.

The beauty is, you can take just one part of your routine and improve it.

• If you don’t usually eat breakfast, start by making a healthy breakfast one morning a week.

• If you’re often rushing, choose one morning to slow down and walk to shul instead of driving.

• Maybe commit to having dinner with your family once a week, or taking one child out for breakfast one day a week.

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At first, these seem small—barely worth mentioning. But give it a few months and you’ll start to notice something: these minor changes, repeated week after week, become part of you. They create a pattern of improvement. And once that pattern is established, you’ll be ready to tackle another small change.

Walk to work once a week. Go for an evening stroll with your spouse. Spend 10 minutes reading something uplifting before bed. Each of these is a “small mitzvah” in the Rashi sense—easily overlooked, but profoundly powerful when done consistently.

Time ticks by regardless. The days turn into weeks, the weeks into months. But if we look after the small things—those little, “heel-level” actions—over time they transform the whole.

This is the message of Eikev: greatness is built in the small, quiet acts we choose not to ignore. Tend to them, and you’ll see big changes unfold in your life—slowly, steadily, and lastingly.

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About the author:

Elimelech Levy is a Rabbi and Coach in Sydney Australia where he runs Chabad Youth NSW, A youth organisation that's focused on providing Jewish enrichment that's educational, fun, social ​& affordable. Elimelech received his MBA from Macquarie University in 2021 then chose to use his studies and experience to become a Results Coach and member of the International Coaching Federation (ICF)  helping people take control of their lives through establishing goals and working towards them. In 2023, Elimelech established the Knei Lecha Chover program focused on matching pairs of Rabbis around the world and providing foundational tools for them to coach each other regularly, helping them to avoid significant fees needed for professional coaching sessions.

Elimelech can be reached via his website elilevy.com.au 

Rosh Hashanah - The Sound of the Shofar

What is the meaning of the Shofar and why do we blow it?

There are a number of answers given like a reminder to repent, to coronate and re-establish G-d as king and maybe even a reminder to him to remember his people as they were from their youth, when he chose them to be his light onto the world.

It's a good idea to actually think about what the sound of the Shofar could mean for me. We go through the ritual each year. We prepare, we practice, we anticipate and then it happens, we hear the Shofar multiple times through the holiday and then it's over and another day comes and life moves on. 

If we don't make something of it, it will likely flow by like another day. So how can we enrich the experience and anchor it so that we can use it to grow and leap forward.

Perhaps this year when it comes time to hear the Shofar, take a few moments to stop and think, if I could use this opportunity right now for anything I want. What would it be. You could waste the moment and think of something totally benign and everything will just go on as usual and no one will know otherwise. Or, you could take this opportunity to really consider, where am I in my life, how am I different now to who or how I was last year this time. Am I happy with the trajectory of my life as it is? Has it moved forward in any way that I can feel good about the passage of time or did I basically just make it through? 

Maybe now is a good time to think about some of the good things that have happened over the past 12 months in my life that I can be grateful for. We often think in a tunnel vision kind of way in relation to our own growth but don't include lots of things going on around us that we have impacted in some way which has helped the wider picture develop over time so it's important to consider what in my bigger picture has changed including some of the small things in life that society doesn't  give much credit to. 

The next thing to think about amongst all these rushing thoughts is regardless of last year's phase in the journey of life, what could be some real, achievable goals that I’d like to work towards between now and next year? What would an ideal me look like and how do I work towards reaching that Ideal me? That could be being a better parent, working on my social life, increasing my spiritual self, reaching out more to others. Learning new skills or taking care of some of the commitments I started last year but did not complete. Pick one or 2 things to focus your energy on, things that you will feel good about achieving and investing energy into. 

Let the sound of the Shofar inspire you to work on your business of life and not only get consumed inside the business of life. See the bigger picture and set some achievable goals to reach and just do it! 

Shana Tova Umetukah!

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About the author:

Elimelech Levy is a Rabbi and Coach in Sydney Australia where he runs Chabad Youth NSW, an organisation that's focused on Providing Jewish enrichment that's educational, fun, social ​& affordable. Elimelech received his MBA from Macquarie University in 2021 then chose to use his studies and experience to become a Results Coach and member of the International Coaching Federation (ICF)  helping people take control of their lives through establishing goals and working towards them. In 2023, Elimelech established the Knei Lecha Chover program focused on matching Rabbis around the world and providing foundational tools for them to coach each other regularly avoiding significant fees needed for professional coaching sessions.

Elimelech can be reached via his website elilevy.com.au